I am not perfect, and I believe no one does. Sometimes I easily dive very deep to my thoughts and ask my heart-How I can be better?How to improve? I believe my self-driven character has been originated from my childhood, where I was empowered with lots of freedom and joy, on the other hand, I learned to parent myself in a very young age.
Being positive always makes me see hope and possibilities, which is so important in good times, and even more important in dark times. When things are not going the right way, I do dive deep again in my thoughts, sometimes it is a painful experience, but I need to learn from lessons. Positivity is the power to drive me to the right direction , sometimes all of a sudden.
There is a bridge in Hyvinkää train station leads up to the pedestrian road which is made of iron. One can see the ground beneath while walking upstairs. I was very afraid of height since I was a kid, even it gets much better now but the feeling is still there more or less when facing height. Usually I do not climb the iron stairs because I need to pass the underground road to the other side of the track in order to get my bike, or most of the time when I climb the stairs, I was in such a “hurry” to reach my destinations that I did not pay attention to what beneath the stairs.
Once I did, and it turns out “terrifying” for me. I think it almost feel same by walking on glasses in the pearl tower in Shanghai. ” Don’t look, move forward” I told myself. But, What can I learn from this experience?
We need to keep our head up while climbing those iron stairs, don’t look how dark or how ” scary” it is below our feet, which is so important to survive and make a difference.
In terms of personal learning, I need to forget the thoughts that I am not perfect( the fear to the unknown under my feet), but keep moving on for my dreams and goals, thus being better and better<3!
When we learn from leadership lessons, we are told very often that a great leader must have a strong sense of self. So what doest it mean? I think it means having a strong sense of Authentic self: Knowing who you really are, what you are passionate to do and what your limits are.
Finland is a great place to discover the authentic self, because it is so peaceful and quiet. Even though against one’s will sometimes, people “have to ” learn being alone, alone with themselves. This is especially hard for those coming from big cities who are used to hustling and bustling surrounded by lots of happenings.
Once I told my husband that it was quite hard feeling sometimes to realize if I do not move, the world surround me will not move! “The world is not moving if you do not move” my husband joked me.I believe most Finns will have similar notions as his because the world in Finland is static. However the world I grow up is so different. As an indigenous Beijinger, my world is moving all the time. Everyday the city looks different! Born after the 80s, I have witnessed China’s fast speed towards internationalization.Thus sometimes I would “escape” to the countryside or travel to southern part of China to find ” tranquility”. So I think it is a very precious gift for me to live in Finland that I do not need to ” escape” any more to find peace, however on the other hand I do miss the “city speed” in Beijing. It is my own responsibility to balance the dualities:).
“It is so quiet that I have to learn to be with myself!” One of the exchange students from my team told me last winter ” I feel so tired because lots of thoughts come to my mind when I am alone!” I understand her feeling.One can “escape” from metropolitan to find peace for a little while, but it is very different to transit yourself from fast speed to stillness all of a sudden and on a long-term basis, especially in dark winter.So there could be pitfalls if one is lost during the procedure of getting rid of “adopted” self in order to find authentic self. And the only key to survive is to be strong, holding the belief that I am stronger than my weakness and I am faithful for the future! The journey to find back one’s authentic self is worth trying and once succeed, one will become stronger than ever before!